MS3

I made it through step 1, and thankfully I won't have to take it again. I'm glad to have that chapter closed. Another has opened, and I hope to post about it with some regularity. I'm aiming to post twice monthly to begin with.

Life measured by exams

The whole year slipped by in 3 and 4 week increments.  Every exam a final, squeezing in life between studying.

I’ve been MIA since kidneys kicked my ass (I’m still really impressed that they actually work).  I’m studying for step 1 now, so I don’t expect to post until later this summer.

My friend just had a baby a few weeks before she was due, a good reminder that life doesn’t stop just because we make a perfect schedule.  Another friend had to put her cat down right before our last exam. We schedule. We study. We’re type A people. But we can’t put life on hold for anything. The most important thing isn’t my score on step 1.  The most important thing is to measure life by the people we share it with.  

3rd year

So I went to a real hospital for the first time, as a med student. I saw a real patient. I think I’m going to love 3^rd year.  That endorphin release you get when answering a question right is pretty nice. It made me think of the clients I used to work with – the recovering addicts. No wonder they found outdoor movies and spa night so uninteresting; they obliterated their reward pathway (nucleus accumbens!) by overloading it with drug-induced endorphin release.  It made me grateful for the simple endorphin rushes in life. 

So getting questions right feels good. I totally can answer questions confidently, whether or not I have any idea, which the attending seem to appreciate. I can organize data into a coherent presentation. I learn quickly, so the individual variation on what attending prefer will not be much issue.  I actually think I’ve learned something in the past year and a half, so all those things combined will make me a good 3^rd student (I hope).  I really loved the interaction with our preceptor. I forgot how much personalities play into the experience of the healthcare provider. Working at that top-notch hospital before medical school gave me a little window into that. I observed mostly, but I also noticed that the politics and play of personalities.  So much of 3^rd year, it seems, is how personalities fit together. Some students will think their resident is a jerk, and some will like the same person.  It’s not necessarily a good thing, but it’s something I can be good at.

It’s nice to have some decreased anxiety about going to the floors next year. There’s just that pesky step 1 between now and then.